Biblical Christianity - Testimony by Melissa Carter

About four years ago God began to lay a desire for home church and a desire for true friendship and family in Christ on my heart. This was something I had never found in the "church" and I would soon begin to search for in the world.



I grew up with a knowledge of God, studied the Word, knew about Holy Spirit but in November 1996 I began my relationship with Christ. Once I began I knew this would never end. I grew up in the pentecostal church, but because of personal differences my father had taken us out of the church and we started to do our own studies at home (this was not something I looked forward to daily). In middle school I had a friend who had invited me to her church, my brother had also been invited by their friends so I went. They were performing a play that evening and I was moved by the depravity of man and said a guided prayer to accept Jesus (honestly I was very disappointed in this prayer, it had done nothing, and effected nothing) and that night Jesus started a work in my heart, not because of the prayer, but because of my true desire for Him. It began a work in my Spirit that soon I was writing poems to my Father that no matter how far I might stray from Him in the future (I hoped and prayed I would not) I would always come back to Him, that I loved Him more than anything and I never wanted to be separate from Him. The next year at school I went back to my old ways and I fell trapped in the desires of the world. In a dream one night God gave me a vision of Hell, a place that I was headed towards. I knew I needed salvation for myself, I had seen God's power in others, and I knew what I desperately needed was the Holy Spirit. I prayed for around six months, cried out to God earnestly for that power, constantly begging for this Spirit. In July 1997 at a youth camp in Tennessee, outside in the open air after a service I cried before God- sobbed- told Him there was no way I could do this without Him, He answered me. I began to speak in tongues and a newness of life came to me, although the night in general was awful (on the way back to my cabin I had scrapped my knee, plus no one really talked to me) I had something new to live for and my present condition did not take my new joy away.


When I got back to school the next year I was eager to tell people what I had learned, the new joy I had and what God was doing in me. I even began leadership at my church and was set to start teaching a bible club at my school. When I got back in the world though my desire for God still remained, and I was going through all the motions of leadership, no one had really worked me through my sin and spoke to me of not entangling myself once again in it. Though I loved God I lacked a firm foundation


Throughout the year I began to seek true discipleship within the church, going to classes, learning, but getting no real substance. I lead a ministry all bible club throughout high school. Although I was speaking the Word and witnessing of Christ substance still lacked in my own life. I found no real friendships in the church, although I fit in just fine, I was not interesting enough to warrant hanging out with. This really bothered me....If I was in the body of Christ did I really need to have a personality that everyone loved in order for them to treat me like their family...much less their friends? I noticed the cliques, not just from the children, but the cliques that were established by the adults. I knew in my heart there was no way a family should exclude like this. I saw people come through the church who did not even have the slightest desire for God (although some did pretend to, God had given me discernment and I could see through their lies) and they were treated as more of a family member than myself! (In present day none of these people serve God any longer.God is just)I knew something was very wrong with this and I began to seek family in other churches. I went to one church I liked, but just didn't feel complete at, then I began going to a Mega church. It's kind of humorous, because the bigger the church I went to the more death I found. "Pastors" would walk around the office and curse, when they saw I was there they would be in shock and quickly silence themselves. I thought to myself "If these people don't know God and they have so much influence within the "church", then who knows Him?!" After three years of playing the "volunteer" (really it's work so we don't have to pay you, and they just give you false hope for a future within the church) and the "leadership" games I turned away from the "church" completely. I was going to seek God on my own, mine as well, there was just as little growth in that as going to these churches.


It did not prove to be successful. I fell into even worse depression than I was going through in the "church". At one point, due to my circumstances in life I tried to kill myself. Shortly after I received a new filling of the Spirit, I began to seek God anew, but again without a family in Christ. This is when Jesus began to impress on me a strong desire for family and a home church, yet once again I fell into the world being concerned only of my own life. I began to pour the desire I had for family out on the people of the world, yielding to the desires of the flesh not for happiness within myself but to enjoy the friendship and family of the world. I began to go out and drink heavily each time I did, (it took many drinks from me to really feel the effects) on one occasion I smoked pot, something I swore I would never do. I found friendship with the world, something I had never found in the "church" (thank goodness I had a husband who was secure enough and loved me enough to allow me to go through this). It took these experiences within the world for me to truly realize what the church was missing..love, friendship, family, communion. I began to desperately desire a home Church, which I had no problem starting on my own. I would draw up building plans and have dreams about a family who truly loved one another in Christ. I caught glimpses of what it could be at different home groups i had been to ...if we just allowed God.


Then my best friend and her husband invited Curtis to the home Church they had been going to. (I was cautious because I hadn't heard good things about it) From the moment I came to this day I have never had so much growth in my walk with Christ! I have been going to this Church for three months (feels like years) and I have never felt the power of God so constant in my life. The light within this fellowship exposes the darkness and it results in maturity. My marriage with Christ and my husband has grown like never before. I've grown more in my relationship with God in three months than I did in the 13 years I spent in the "church". I now understand what the Word means when it says "forsake not the assembling of yourselves together". I now have no desire to! My heart has bonded with my family in Christ. We work together as the body, as we should! God has birthed true passion in me, for His sake, not my own! Praise God for the family, the body of Christ!


I am currently learning about the foundations (the elementary teaching Paul talks about) of our doctrines, things that no one has ever taught me. How was I ever supposed to leave the milk and move to the meat if no one was ever feeding even the milk to me! In this Church there are true apostles who devote themselves to loving (purely), discipling, and caring for God's sheep. Not like the "evangelists" today who speak about the love of Christ with no commitment to loving any but His own household (sometimes not even that). Praise be to God for drawing me to His people!


I have found the true Church, those who are willing to lay their lives down for friends, those who take your hardship as their own...the church that God has given me visions of. This is the true joy of Christ, our love for one another!